You know Im doing this LOL
- Snow White: Running through the dark woods! #damnnatureyouscary #mystepmomiscrazy
- Cinderella: Fairy Godmother just gave me a sparkling dress and glass heels. #swag
- Aurora: Turns out that guy I met in the woods is a prince! #winning
- Ariel: I should’ve thought of using this when Ursula took my voice! #gingerproblems
- Belle: My first night as prisoner, and the furniture is talking to me. #whatismylife
- Jasmine: #shitthatblows Finding out the guy who saved your life has been executed… :(
- Pocahontas: I don’t want to mary Kocoum… but my dad wants me to. #nativeamericanprincessproblems
- Mulan: Just saved China from the Huns. #likeaboss
- Tiana: Evil witch doctor says I can have it all if I give him his voodo charm. #childplease
- Rapunzel: Every year on my birthday, there’s a bunch of floating lights in the nearby kingdom. #whatacoincidence
Lol
Why being a girl isn't working out for me:
Body: Oh, guess what time of the month it is!
Me: Please, god, no--
Ovaries: ALL SYSTEMS GOOOOOOOO!!!
Brain: I quit. I quit. Kittens and cupcakes and -- no one loves me -- Oh my god salty snacks! -- I am furious!
Me: Please, guys, calm down--
Face: TIME TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER LIKED ABOUT ME. I'M GROWING MOUNTAINS, BITCHES.
Brain: And now I'm ugly! shbdksdnksbn
Torso: Time to practice labor. Cramp this bitch up. GO GO GO GO GO GO
Me: STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
Stomach: Lol clothes cant fit you anymore. You are bloated. You are now a balloooooooon!
Me: I hate you all.
Brain: I KNOW EVERYONE HATES ME I AM SO DEPRESSED. We need to procreate.
Face: Lol, I'm not done yet.
Uterus: What did I ever do to deserve this?
Brain: You just wait uterus. They're going to make you hold a baby for like 9 months straight.
Uterus: You mother fuckers.
Torso: CONTRACT!
Me: I quit being female, I am now a llama.
Brain: Me gusta.
